BUT DON'T JUST TAKE IT FROM US
At 1985 Games, we want to give you the stuff you didn't know you needed. The kind of products you wouldn't think to search for when you're hunting for your next dice set or looking to gift someone. This doesn't always make it easy for us to find our target audience, but somehow, with our Starstorm VHS dice, we did: Outside of Obojima, these retro sets are one of our top sellers.
Why? We have no idea.
To gain some customer insights, we reached out to dice hoarding blogger, Marcus Aurollicus, who recently wrote this superb post on how to organize your dice when you don't roll them for stats. Here's what he has to say about our Starstorm VHS dice— and what the (bleep) they can add to your dice hoard. (Editor's Note: the tone is a bit serious for us, but hear him out.)
A WORD FROM MARCUS AUROLLICUS
Confession: I don't play D&D. But I do collect role-playing dice, and my house looks like it's slowly sinking in a sea of Candy Land pastels and iridescent swirls. From mystery bags to luxury sets, I'm always searching for dice that give form to my inner experience; the way the rain evokes a lost past in Blade Runner, the way the sea conjures up feelings of isolation and helplessness in Jaws.
The colors, textures, edges, cores of my dice give structure—you might even say order—to the viscous flux that is my life. Otherwise, the days feel like an endless sludge of bills, phone trees, authentication codes, convenience fees, and what Cory Doctorow called "ensh***ification"—your favorite online platforms turning into a Kafka dumpster fire. Talk about helplessness. But before you bail on me for being a buzzkill, think about whether any of this means something to you (I am guessing it does).
And if so, I want you to close your eyes. Picture this: A miniature cloud of nebular mist like an image captured by the James Webb telescope. An illusion cast by the seven polished, neatly etched polyhedral dice resting in the palm of your hand. Each piece shimmers with teals, blues, and greens through a shadowy veil of clear resin. Clicking them together, feeling their keen edges and gliding lines, you enjoy a moment's relief from surviving in a rapidly declining civilization.
As Charles Bukowski put it, "Can you remember who you were, before the world told you who to be?" These dice give form to that buried memory. Or at least one sparkly facet of it.
'NUFF POETRY, WHAT ABOUT THE DICE?
Weird as it may sound, I really do feel this way about my Starstorm VHS dice from 1985 Games. And I'm not saying that as an affiliate. I genuinely love this set of dice. Keep in mind I don't use them for tabletop gaming, I lean on them for—I guess you would call it—emotional support. Besides reminding me I'm more than the bots that drain my life, they give me the simple childish pleasure of staring at shiny things and knowing they're around whenever I need them. They're arcade flashes, stress balls, and Shel Silverstein's The Giving Tree in a scintillating handful of resin.
But are you wondering if I've forgotten something? I haven't: These dice come in a small laminated case that looks like a video cassette box from the days of television static and MS-DOS. Forget my somewhat Jungian appreciation of Starstorm—a quick look at Etsy will show you that shoppers really connect with its retro vibe. I was too young to come of age in the '80s, but I can see why. The soft rainbow wash gives the cover a well-worn look, while the gimmick line beneath says, "Hi-Fi Video Dice by 1985G." I don't know if I'm looking at a children's educational video or a bioweapon in a David Cronenberg film. All of which is to say this packaging is really fun.
BE KIND, REWIND
Caveat: The VHS Starstorm dice require special handling. Some knowledge of Eastern massage therapy techniques could go a long way during the unboxing process. It takes a strong yet gentle hand to pull the foam insert from the box and finer-than-fine motor skills to extract the dice from their slots. But once achieved, you've got a doorway through time and a pinch of stardust in the palm of your hand.
And when that's not enough, there are five other sets in the 1985 Games VHS line. So far I've only got Starstorm, but someday I'm going to have all six lined up vertically on my desktop, just like my dad's bowling tournament recordings which he kept on the carpet in front of the VCR. Yep—they were doing that sort of thing well into the '90s. As Bryan Adams said in "Summer of ’69," ‘Those were the best days of my life."
There you have it. My take on the VHS Starstorm dice set by 1985 Games. It's not only a pocketful of cosmic connection, it's super-old school cool. So pick up that green rotary phone, dial 1-9-8-5, and tell the dice goblin to quit nagging at you, because it's about to get a feast.
And if it eats the tape, that's all right.
Explore Dice Inspired by the Cosmos
Curious for more dice chaos and RPG tales? Roll over to D20 Cabal, our affiliate blog for epic dice collections and game-night adventures.